monkey brain No. 5
In times like these, we must ask ourselves, WWJD?
Welcome to Monkey Brain — the series where I share a stream of random thoughts from the month, powered by Billy, the monkey banging cymbals in my head. If it’s your first time here and this is your first impression of me, welcome, hello, and maybe sorry? Glad to have you here. If you’ve been here before, happy to have you back. Now let’s get into it.
If things around you crumble
No, you don't have to stumble and fall
Keep pushing on and don't you look back- Sound of Blackness, Optimistic
I remember why we must say no to drugs.
I have to be honest and talk about how the past month, I've been on one of the strongest drugs across America. Coffee. Before I get into this shameful admission, I have to say that I am so serious when I say caffeine is a drug, and too many of y’all are okay with being addicts. Anywho, I’ve been spending more time at coffee shops recently, and one day decided to get an Americana. Typically, I reserve drinking coffee for emergencies only, but I went against my own best judgement because it was giving “when in Rome.” Twenty minutes after a cup, I found myself with a level of energy that left me prepared to take on the world. I was texting friends affirmations, making a billion and one lists of tasks to complete, and sharing rapid-fire notes on Substack. I didn’t realize it was due to the coffee until the next day, when I felt less energized. Making the connection, I foolishly purchased a Greka (Moka pot) and it’s been cups of Afra Café’s Honduran coffee ever since. I refuse to continue this and am reverting to tea in March. After a day of no coffee, immediately the withdrawals kick in and I actually hate that for me. I don’t know how yall can remain here, but I refuse and am officially in recovery. With that being said, if yall need my coffee plug for that Honduran coffee, let me know.
Help save me from going back on the apps
A while ago I started playing San Andreas and have been trying to play as many Grand Theft Autos as I can before the new one drops, and its been a dope time just running through missions and seeing places that are familiar in real time. This started as me just playing on my phone, and now I have a switch because the commitment has been that deep for me. I’ve been enjoying myself but have recently gotten stuck on a mission where CJ has to take weapons from a military base with Ryder and has to load boxes in his truck and keep Ryder alive. For the life of me, I CAN NOT GET PAST THIS MISSION. I’ve been stuck on it for a while, which has deterred me from playing bc it really has been a task, bro. One of my friends, who is really my little brother, has been giving me a hard time about it, taunting me for not finishing, but doesn’t wanna help me. Mad fake if you ask me, but what do I know?! It’s getting to the point where I’ve considered downloading one of those God forsaken apps to literally put in the bio that I’m looking for someone to help me with this mission. Please send help. Don’t let me go back into that horrible ass place yall. Please.
What that dowry do?
I shared a note that said “traditional this, traditional that. If we doing this traditional thing, WHERE IS THE DOWRY?” and I said what I said. Personally, I feel like we’re not leaning into these traditional conversations enough. Instead of arguing or letting it get under my skin, I’ma start requesting a dowry. At this point, I don’t care to hear about any traditional requirements if we’re not discussing a dowry. I don’t wanna hear about what our ancestors did if again, we’re not discussing a dowry. We bringing up biblical expectations? Let’s do it. There’s a bride price! Ol’ boy doesn’t believe in Jesus, and is Muslim, hello Mahr! (That’s more of a mutually agreed upon marriage gift than a bride price that’s negotiated and given to the bride). Regardless, I say all this to say, we gotta bring these traditional principles back in the mix in the conversation of tradition. Some of these dudes don’t wanna come with anything but a hard-on and headaches. Let’s be for real. Don’t even move like J Smoov and out here making crazy demands. Now that I think about it..
Whatever happened to J Smoov?
For those who don’t know, there was a YouTube dance sensation named J Smoov who would basically thrust all over anything and everything to songs like Nobody by Keith Sweat and Say It by T-Pain. Those videos were some that I ABSOLUTELY should not have been watching as a pre-teen, but the mere acrobatics of it all fascinated me. It was erotic enough and quite athletic if you ask me. Anyway, that man had YouTube on lock before it was even a thing. Then suddenly, when the world needed him most, he vanished. I actually happened to look into where he’s been, and somehow he ended up getting locked up and went to prison. The more you know. Anywho! Those videos are part of Black history, and that man deserves his flowers because he has truly influenced a generation of people. I mean, the influence may not have been the best because I’m sure it encouraged a gang of minors to be their freakiest of freaks, but nonetheless, that man’s impact lives on and has helped birth so many new babies of our time. For Black History Month, we need to honor him as one of the first Black internet influencers who single handedly contributed to bringing life on this planet.
WWJD?
The world is one fire. One tragedy after the other, the economy is a hot ass mess, America is on the verge of war, folks are being called ni**er at award shows, things are in disarray. In trying times like these, there really is only one man who can help us out. One man whose sacrifice, passion, and ability to call out the powers that be to expose the darkness of this world. One man whose impact makes me ask myself WWJD? What Would Jussie Do? Say what you want about that man, but Jussie Smollett was for the people. That man was not playing about black folks and stood ten toes behind corrupt systems and powers. I don’t believe we’re mad enough, y’all. We haven’t set up a scheme like Todd did to come at them with the bullshit mad. We need to take some notes from our good brother and shake shit up! Where are the finesssers of our time? Where are the people willing to go hard on our behalf? I need us to get activated once we’re done resting and minding our business. Power to the people!
I’m Black and I’m Proud
It goes without saying that I am forever inspired by being black. Black history month this year was filled with so much pride and honor. Starting off this month, seeing the Haitian flag & ayiti be mentioned during Benito’s Superbowl performance (unfortunately without the Puerto Rican princess) made me so moved to be seen and represented as a Caribbean. Especially since there’s a clear effort to separate this region from America, but that’s another topic for another day. I spent more of my time in black asf spaces, have been working in Slauson/Crenshaw right in the newly named Nipsey Hussle Square, and seeing how as black folks, even when shit is rough we constantly come to each other’s defense and rescue in the midst of turmoil reminded me that I truly am blessed to occupy this skin that I’m in. My Valentine’s Day was even occupied with beautiful black folk, and it gave me even more of a moment to just look at us and be excited and in awe at all that we can do and have done. Every end of the month, I’m sad it’s come to an end. Black History for me isn’t reduced to a month; I have the honor of living it every day and seeing it be created right before my own eyes. I had a thought a few weeks ago, reflecting on what it means to be Black, specifically a Black Woman. I thought about how, in the event that we really only have one life to live, like this is our only lap around this thing we call life, how lucky am I to live and experience it as a Black woman, born and raised on American soil by way of Haiti? How lucky am I to carry, yes, the weight of these identities, but also the honor, the favor, and the diaspora that come with them. I wouldn’t want it any other way. No matter how much this world tries to get me to hate myself, I know I was made in the divine image of God. That no matter what is going on in this world, to my people or me, as long as I keep my head to the sky, I can win, like we’ve done many times before. I am rich, we are rich, and I am optimistic that this, too, shall pass. Happy Black History Month, Yall. Keep hope alive.
bell be on that 🪝